Bear Hug!
by mini-eggs1
Summary: When Luffy sees his first-mate and cook 'cuddling', he wants to join in too (innocently...ahem) - and unknowingly reveals their secret to the girls of the crew! When they decide to have a little fun, things take a comical turn... Zoro X Sanji, starts off light, gets a little more steamy... (Image from One Piece Opening 5)
1. Bear Hug

Luffy grinned.  
Enveloped in the soft, blue light streaming down from the moon, little starry lights winked at the world below. The sea gently lapped against the shore, and the last few embers of the campfire flames burnt away, the little red sparks swept off on the breeze.  
Luffy sighed happily and stared out at the sea, his legs folded, hands resting on the soft, white sand.

"One Piece..."

A soft snore rose from beside him, and Luffy turned around to laugh at his nakama, all gathered around the burnt out wood and  
stones. The snorer (that'd be Usopp) mumbled and gurgled like a baby, and next to him Chopper giggled, and blushed. The ladies  
- Nami first, then Robin - dozed softly, and Luffy smiled proudly as he remembered the bond they all shared...

And then Luffy's jet eyes darted excitedly over to his first-mate. Zoro's snores (by far exceeding Usopp's) rumbled out into the night...  
except they were completely muffled by the warmth of the love-cook's chest, and faint whispers of Zoro's breath made the cook's sleek, blonde hair rise and fall rhythmically. Sanji's hand rested gently on Zoro's head.

Luffy cocked his head over to the side in curiosity - his childlike mind saw innocence...and love.  
Luffy leaped up, with a grin of triumph on his face as he flew towards his nakama, arms outstretched, yelling:

"Minna! Immediate Bear Hug Time!"

"Luffy..." Nami held her hand to her face in exasperation. "WHY do you have to be SUCH an idiot?"

"Awwww, but Nami! I wanted to cuddle too!"

There was a slight pause of confusion, before Nami continued (ignoring the non sequitur).

"Well, cuddle on your own time, in your own space, AND WITH YOURSLEF! We're nakama, not lovers, y'know."

Luffy let his lower lip tremble dramatically, and he raised his puppy-dog eyes towards the crew.

"B-but, if Sanji and Zoro can cuddle, then why can't I?"

"Well, because - " Nami stopped, her eyes growing wide. "Eh?! Say again?!" Disbelief was the only word.

This all came about rather simply. After Luffy's war-like declaration of 'immediate bear hug time', he had landed on all 6 of his nakama  
at once, using his "Gomu Gomu no...Fuusen!" (which had been enough to warn everyone something resembling a Luffy- was coming).  
Anyway, with the sun just peeking up on the horizon, it had taken nearly precisely two hours for everyone to work out what was happening. By that time,it was time to get up anyway.  
Things had, to say the least, spiraled out of control by that time:

EVERYONE had been shocked. EVERYONE had been crushed. NO ONE was happy.  
Nami was mad. Usopp was confused. Chopper was lost (turned out he'd been plastered onto Luffy's back by the sheer 'force of Fuusen'). Robin had saved herself from impact using her arms. Zoro was still asleep...on top of Sanji (who, in turn, had been horrified, touched, slightly turned on, and blushing badly, thanks to Zoro).  
After extracting himself from the swordsman, Sanji used the commotion to pray no one had noticed.

_Imagine if my darling Nami-san or Robin-chan had seen...Marimo. Dead._

Getting ready for departure, Nami designated a final scope of the island for Sanji and Zoro, seeing as Luffy was under ship-arrest until  
they set sail, and the two nakama had headed off into the forest, bickering, kicking and unsheathing swords as they went.

Not long after, Luffy dropped his 'cuddling' bombshell.

Robin chuckled.

"How amusing." she giggled happily.

Nami's head slowly jerked to face Robin. She blushed.

"Oi...You don't think they...do more than cuddling, do you Robin?"

All of a sudden, a moan came rose from deep within the forest - it was Sanji's voice. Nami's jaw dropped, and she walked as fast as she could towards the ship.

**Authors Note: Ok, I know it's short - I can't decide whether to have a follow up chapter (it's not a story as such, more of a little** **'incident'), or just leave it here? Basically, I have an idea of what the 2nd (a.k.a final) chapter would be ( three guesses what...), but let me know if you think I should leave it here or move forward! :D**


	2. This is gonna be fun

**Authors Note: Yo there, peeps! Chapter 2, since I had some reviews telling me to continue and...I guess I kinda wanted to anyway! It started off as a one-shot, now it's two chapters, and it OBVIOUSLY can't end where I've left it so...**

**Hope you enjoy~**

Walking through the dimly lit forest with the little beams of the rising sun shooting shards of light onto the ferny floor, the two nakama

were carefully picking their way over the precarious foliage.  
Sanji lead the way, his hands in his pockets, an unlit cigarette dangling from his lips. His face was flushed and pink - from the heat, of course. It had NOTHING to do with the marimo. Absolutely. Nothing.  
Dragged from his all-consuming thoughts, Sanji sensed an odd feeling of...loneliness.

"O-oi?!" Sanji swirled around, his eyes darting to where he was SURE Zoro had been following him. Predictably, there was no Marimo.

"_Typical_..." Sanji groaned, raising his slender fingers to his hair. He cleared his throat.

"MMMMMAAARRRIIMMMOOOOOO! OOOOOOO-IIIIIIII! Where the hell are yo-"

"What the fuck, cook? I'm right here." Zoro raised his arms above his head in mock surrender, stepping out from behind Sanji, a look of confusion and...something else...on his face.

"Eh?" Sanji looked at Zoro in utter confusion. " What the - Oi. Don't disappear like that, idiot. " Sanji grumbled, trying to hide the pink blush growing steadily on his cheeks. He strode off purposefully through the foliage.

The swordsman smirked.

"Don't back-pedal, dumbass." He said, following." You just panicked at the thought of being without me, right?"

Sanji stopped, and his fists clenched. He craned his neck slowly.

"What was that, idiot-marimo? You're just too damn well camouflaged in all this green. Get some normal hair, will ya'?"

Drawing level with the cook, Zoro held his pleased smile as Sanji averted his eyes. Refusing to make any kind of eye-contact or acknowledge the man drawing closer to him. Raising his fingers to Sanji, Zoro turned the face towards him, forcing him to look.  
He saw could feel the burning cheeks, see the panicked eye, and hear the slightly heavy breathing Sanji was trying to hide.

"Don't turn away..." Zoro mumbled, leaning in slowly, still holding Sanji's chin in his fingers. The cook's legs had already melted and he let himself get drawn forward into Zoro's arms, and into his lips..

_"How can such a big brute be so...gentle?_" Sanji wondered, letting himself become enveloped in Zoro's warmth.

The swordsman's tongue, once past Sanji's lips, became ferocious. It plunged deep into the cook's mouth, devouring every corner of the cavern before pulling out desperately for air with a loud stood there panting for a moment, Zoro's arms gripping the cook's waist and neck possessively, staring intently into the one shimmering, blue eye.

Sanji couldn't stop himself staring at Zoro's lips. They were so kissable...

_TOO DAMN KISSABLE! _

Sanji forced his gaze up into the fiery eyes, wanting him, needing him.

"Idiot, m-marimo. Didn't I tell you we were in a no-sex relationship until you learnt some manners?..." Sanji paused - he didn't have enough will power to carry on and ignore his need for his swordsman. But this one needed rules.

"I can't help it... " The swordsman breathed lustfully onto Sanji's lips."There's no way I'm gonna suppress my desire for you. Why should I?"

His hands slid slowly down Sanji's waist, and slipped themselves onto his ass - softy, but firmly. He pulled their bodies closer and Sanji shivered. Sanji glared, his whole face mad.

"Don't be such an asshole, Zoro! Be more like you _want it, _rather than you're gonna violate me just to feed your primal instincts like some damn tiger!"

Zoro pressed his lips once against the cook's mouth in a soft kiss.

_"I want you..."_

Another kiss.

"_I need you..."_

And another_._

_"So why can't I have you?"_

_"..."_

Sanji couldn't help himself.

Fuck manners - marimos don't have the genes for 'em anyway...

"What do I do with a boy like yo-?!"

Before Sanji had even got the words out, Zoro was grinding his hips roughly against him, slamming his tongue - expertly, yet savagely - down the cook's throat. Sanji couldn't stifle the moan he'd been holding in ever since he'd left the beach. Zoro's hands massaged the skin on the backs of Sanji's thighs, and he slowly moved his hands, still kneading, upwards.

Sanji could barely process all the different ways he was being aroused - hot, wet, desperate lips attacking his throat, hands groping along his thighs and backside, an agonizingly brilliant grinding against his groin...

"Zoro..." he panted, breaking the kiss roughly and wetly. "I-if you keep doing that - I'll be - done just from - you touching me..."

He shouldn't have said anything.

"Mmm? Well, now _that's _interesting..." Zoro growled, slowly driving his fingers under Sanji's shirt, reaching up to play with a hard nipple.

"ARGH! N-no...Zoro - don't!" Sanji jolted, the attention on his chest sending ripples of excitement coursing down to his already throbbing groin. "I-I really can't take it..."

The swordsman grinned evilly.

"Try it."

And with that, Zoro threw his free hand forward, and grabbed Sanji's penis through his pants. He began rolling, massaging, groping and kneading violently...Sanji threw his head back in shock.

And with that, he let out a loud, long, lust-driven moan, screaming out as he came, with Zoro not far behind him.

Nami paced to and fro, her heels clicking rhythmically on the wooden planks of the cabin. Robin sat on her bed, and lent on the pillow, a soft, tender smile sitting on her lips. Nami, on the other hand, was glaring furiously. She looked completely perplexed - panicked - and was insensible to anything around her.

"Robin, what do we do?"

"Well-"

"I mean, we can't just LET IT BE, right?"

"I think tha-"

"But what if they just deny it? Then WE'RE the ones doing something underhand...this is terrible, Robin, terrible..."

Robin wasn't sure whether it was worth her trying to speak again. Nami turned silent, a little bead of sweat trickling down her cheek.

"Nami?"

"...they'd better pay me, or..."

"Nami." Robin said sharply, her voice turning orderly and decisive. Nami stopped pacing, and looked at her nakama for the first time since they'd boarded.

"Listen, Navigator-san. What we have heard today has led you to jump to rash conclusions."

"But, R-Robin," Nami stuttered, extending her arms matter-of-factly, "Didn't you hear what Luffy sa-".

"I did. He said that he had seen swordsman-san and cook-san 'cuddling'."

Nami nodded emphatically.

" 'Cuddling' and 'fucking' are two very different things." Robin said, brazenly. "We are all nakama, and trust each other implicitly. Isn't it  
possible that those two ended up cuddling like that in their sleep, subconsciously?"

Nami blushed from how 'straight to the point' Robin was.

"I-I guess. But what about the...moan..."she mumbled, embarrassed ."I'd know Sanji's voice anywhere."

Robin nodded.

"Yes, I believe it WAS cook-san we heard..."she trailed off, thinking. All of a sudden, she looked up. "We need to find out, I know that.  
I have an idea, navigator-san but it involves patience, and, best of all, secrecy." She smiled, her long eyelashes hiding the gleam in her eyes.

Nami's eyes started to perk up, and she sat down on the bed next to her friend.

"Go on, Robin..." she whispered excitedly.

This was gonna be fun.


	3. Chapter 3

Nami smiled. For once, everything had seemed calm and relaxing since they'd set sail from the last  
island. It was so...quiet  
Luffy stared out over the vast, empty sea. From his perch at the head of the ship, he lent back and  
gazed up at the sky...evidently deep in thought...

"SAANNNJJJIII!" Luffy yelled, raising his arms above his head determinedly. "I'm starving! I want breakfast!"  
Nami sighed.

Quiet? Like hell.

"Oi, Luffy! Put down my crumpet!" Usopp cried indignantly, leaping up from the table.  
Luffy shook his head violently.  
""Whaf Grumpwet?" he mouthed innocently, little pieces of jam-covered dough slipping out from his mouth.  
"LIAR! Return that crumpet to the great Captain Usopp, and I shall spare you the wrath of my 8,000 folllowers!"

Luffy swallowed and grinned at Usopp's face - which was one of utter betrayal and horror.

Sanji sighed, wiping his hands on a dishcloth.

"Usopp, haven't you learned? You've been on this ship from the start, and yet you're always so slow...here."The cook

set a new plate down in front of the sharpshooter, who looked up at Sanji with true love in his eyes.

"T-thank you, Sanji...you're so ki-"

"Shut up, and eat. I only want the love of my two darling ladies!" Sanji chirped, twirling over to stand between the girls at the other end of the table. "Ah, Nami-san, Robin-chan...how are you enjoying breakfast? I made it with a special ingredient-of-LURRVE just for you two, my sweets...!"

Zoro rolled his eyes.

The girls nodded in appreciation. Nami smiled sweetly at Sanji and reached up to place a loving hand on his cheek.  
"It's _divine_, Sanji-san..." she purred, gently caressing his jaw, her eyes sparkling.

The cook nearly went into orbit. He just stood -dazed, his heart visibly throbbing out of chest, his eyes pumping like love-hearts...  
Zoro, on the other hand, just glared. His glare was so intense, his eyes completely lost focus on the object of his anger, and he had to give his head a shake to bring himself back to the present moment.

_What the hell?!...what the fuck is Nami doing with my-_

Zoro stopped his thoughts suddenly. What was he thinking? If Nami wanted to get all touchy-feely with the shitty cook, why should he care?

Nami looked up at Zoro, seeing the annoyance on his face. A crafty smile played on her lips; a challenge in her eye.  
Zoro's face set. He watched her turn again to Sanji in horror, as she sightly rose from her seat...

_Fuck that...oi, what's that witch planning on doi-_

Nami, silently, softly, and ever-so-sweetly, placed a tender kiss on Sanji's lips-

**CRACK!**

Zoro looked down suddenly at his hands - glass shards were drawing little droplets of blood from his palm and fingers. His glass, crushed and broken, lay smashed by his plate on the table. All eyes turned towards Zoro, and the kitchen fell silent in suprise.

But Zoro just got up, and walked silently out of the kitchen.

_The glass...he crushed the fucking glass?_.

Sanji sighed.

Zoro was _definitely _avoiding him. But, why? What the hell was up with the shitty marimo? He'd been JUST FINE a few hours ago, feeling the cook up in the forest...

Leaning on the rail of the ship, Sanji threw the cigarette end over into the sea, and pulled out another. He didn't get the guy...and god damn him, it was making the cook feel so..._guilty. _Like he'd done something wrong...

All of a sudden, the sound of heavy boots went thumping along the deck behind him. Sanji swirled around - any chance to speak with the swordsman, he wanted to get. For the last few hours, he'd been constantly in company - or Zoro had been nowhere to be found. It was driving him crazy.  
Turning round, he glared as Zoro walked straight past him, not even sparing him a glance.

"Oi, marimo! What the hell is up with you today?"

Sanji placed a firm hand on Zoro's shoulder, to try and stop him walking forward (or rather, away) from him, mid-question.

Zoro turned, his eyes emotionless and dark.

"Eh? Whaddya mean, shit-cook?"  
The words were Zoro's, but the tone wasn't - it lacked the usual complete lack of feeling - this indifference...it sounded..._put on._  
Sanji tried again.

"What the hell's got you so pissed off with me?"

"I'm always pissed with you."

"Don't play dumb. Something's wrong..."

Zoro's mask wavered at the sound of concern in Sanji's voice.

"It's nothing. And that marks the end of conversation, shit-cook."

Zoro wrenched his shoulder away from Sanji's grip, and walked away heavily, leaving the cook feeling rather hopeless.

"Robin, we are definitely onto something - I mean, you saw Zoro's reaction...that says it all!"

Robin nodded slightly, then shook her head.

"I agree, it does confirm the POSSIBILITY...but it still proves nothing. But now that we're more sure of the likelihood, the time has come to put them top the test."

Nami laughed at Robin's playful tone.

"I get you. So - well, we'd better not be too obvious..."

"Indeed. Therefore, " Robin chuckled, standing up and heading out on deck, "let's start with a game."

The aura on the Merry was one of depression. Everyone could feel the unspoken tension between their nakama : Nami and Robin had been constantly disappearing to have 'private talks', Luffy was bored, Sanji was miserable and thoughtful, Zoro was pissed (with Nami and the cook), annoyed and depressed.  
This, however, provided the girls with the ideal stage to execute their plan..

Mid-afternoon, with the sea looking emptier than ever, and a painful silence emanating from the ship, Nami waited for all her nakama to be on Merry's deck at the same time (with Robin's subtle aid, of course), to begin.

With everyone unknowingly assembled: Luffy and Usopp fishing over the side; Chopper watching avidly; Zoro asleep on deck; Nami looking at a book with Robin, and Sanji appearing with snacks for the ladies, Nami cleared her throat.

"Ah, Sanji-san...I'm incredibly bored...it's so quiet today.."

"Yes, my beloved Nami-swan - but I am never bored, when your beauty is there for me to observe!"

Nami grinned, and feigned surprise.

"Ah, I have a great idea! Minna!" she called, turning away from Sanji to face the deck." Listen up! We need something to put a bit more life back onto the ship - like a game!"

The crew's curiosity was evident, and Luffy and Chopper were hugging each other at Nami's preliminary mention of a 'game'.

"Now, "she began, as soon as everyone was watching her (and Zoro had opened his eyes). "The next island is quite a way away - we won't reach it for a good while. It's unlikely that we'll run into the marines in this part of the Grand Line, they said that at the last island, so I though we could all do with a  
little amusement..."

Zoro folded his arms and snorted. He closed his eyes again.

"Huh, not for me. My idea of amusement is a long nap and some sake."

Sanji growled. He stormed over to the swordsman, and sent a kick down into his stmach.

"Shitty marimo. Listen to what Nami-san's got to say; don't just bloody go back to sleep!"

Nami smiled - somewhat evilly-.

"Don't worry Zoro, you'll like this. We''re going to play a series of games - challenges, if you will."

Zoro, having been winded by the cook's foot, just sat up, coughing. When he had finally regained enough breath to stand up, he shuffled to his feet.

"Huh, no can do. Like I said, if it doesn't include sake, it's won't even have a chance at being fun."

Nami rolled her eyes, and Robin smiled, putting her book aside.

"Ah, but swordsman-san, that's perfectly manageable. We can make that the first challenge, right, Nami?"

Nami nodded, and she beckoned to everyone to sit on the deck beside her deckchair (on the floor, of course).

Zoro stopped and looked around with suspicion.

_What the hell is going on here? Why are they acting so..._

_"_Oi, shithead. Don't just stand there like the idiot you are, come on."

Sanji grabbed Zoro by his arm, and Zoro flinched at the contact. Even the cook's hand felt so warm...

"Sit," The cook ordered, dropping Zoro's arm emphatically, "before I make my darling Nami-san double your loan, shit-for-brains idiot-marimo bastard."

Sanji slid to the floor beside the glaring swordsman who was trying to ignore the warmth in his cheeks. For some reason, he felt the cook by just being next to him - he wanted to be closer to him, to feel a little bit more..._sure_ that Sanji was by his side, and not with...

Zoro didn't have the time to brood for long, when Nami's voice cut through the momentary silence. There was a sly smile playing on her lips, as she began to speak.

"It's very simple - this is just a bit of fun to pass away the time."

"You mean - thy're like party games?!" Luffy burst out excitedly.

"Exactly." Robin smiled, pulling a box from behind her back. "And Round 1...will be a drinking competition."

"It's incredibly simple." Nami grinned, looking around the group in a circle." Whoever can drink the most, wins. Oh, but don't forget...try and keep your senses - this is only the first round."

**Author's note : Ah~long chapter! The next will probably be the last so...updating very soon**! **Thanks so much if you're reading, and please review (it'll make me SO haappppyyy :D)**


	4. Thanks, Shit-cook

**No wasting time...on with the story :D Mwhahaha...**

"Ahhhhh..."

The sound of a bottle hitting the deck resonated through the still air. Someone hiccuped.

"_N-next..*hic*...b-bwottle, Nami...*hic*...swann..."_

_Z_oro smirked at the cook beside him, and raised his eyebrows.

"I don't think so, shitty-cook. I've never seen a guy so pissed off before in my life...just accept defeat. I win, and that's that.

_"Don't *hic*...b-be such an ass*hic*hole, marimo~. Think you win, do ya'?"_

"Yep." Zoro answered readily, only a slight blush on his cheeks from the alcohol. "_At everything."_

While the swordsman was barely showing any signs of drunkenness, Sanji was, as Zoro had said, utterly pissed. His jacket had been discarded, and lay crumpled on the floor behind him; the collar of his silk blue shirt was wide open, the buttons only done up halfway up his chest; his black tie hung loosely around his throat, and his clothes were stained with sake. He sat so close to the swordsman that he may as well have been sitting in his lap - he was leaning entirely on Zoro's chest to stay upright, his head lolling about on the marimo's shoulder every now and then.

As for his face...it was flushed to the point of being redder than Buggy's nose - his hair was messy and disheveled (thanks to how many times he's run his hands through it from his high, and lolling it around Zoro's chest), and his blue eye, though slightly misty, was, Zoro thought, _incredibly sexy._

Both men outstretched their hands to Nami expectantly, all the while maintaining their half-smoldering half-challenging eye contact, waiting for the next bottle.

There was a pause. Nobody moved. When the two men looked up, Nami was glaring at them.

"That's it." she said.

Zoro and Sanji looked at her, confused.

"What? What do you mean?" Zoro asked (Sanji looked like he tried to as well, but he was becoming more intoxicated by the second and couldn't muster the brainpower to speak).

"That's it." Nami repeated, dryly, a venomous undertone creeping into her voice. "We're out of sake. You drank the ship out."

Again, there was a pause, as Zoro looked around at his nakama, who were watching the two 19 year olds, in a mix of awe and shock.

_How the hell? Had they really drunk that much? That's impossible..._

Zoro felt fine - but then he was used to drinking bottle after bottle, so that wasn't any kind of measure. Then he looked down at Sanji. And nearly fell over with shock.

Sanji was looking deep into Zoro's eyes, his one sapphire eye clouded by a mix a alcohol and..._lust._

_Oh shit... _Zoro thought, not being able to tear away his gaze from the cook's. Sanji had twisted shoulders around, so that he was breathing heavily on Zoro's lips, drawing ever closer. Zoro could smell, and almost taste, the amount of sake the chef had downed, and he felt a familiar surge of something in his chest.

Sanji's lips curled seductively, and he licked his lips. All of a sudden, he swung his lithe legs around Zoro's waist, straddling him in one swift, fleeting movement. He grouond his hips down onto Zoro, and the swordsman blushed at how _bloody good it felt._ His arms wrapped themselves around Zoro's neck ,and Sanji let his azure eye search Zoro's face...when the cook closed his it, and let out a deep sigh,the swordsman knew that their situation was too far gone for saving.

Suddenly, Zoro didn't give a damn that all his crew were watching - hell, if the sexual tension hadn't already killed them, they weren't going to be deceived much longer anyway.

Zoro couldn't suppress his grin.

Suddenly, as he lunged forward to ravage his cook's pink, swollen lips, all Zoro heard was:

**"ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZzzzzzzzzzz..."**

****Still encased in Zoro's arms, the chef was fast asleep.

_Well, that was bloody awkward._

Zoro had, to be fair, been as shocked as his nakama to find his lover had fallen asleep, mid lap dance, and just before Zoro had been about to give him the hottest kiss of his life.

Swinging in his hammock in the men's quarters, Zoro looked over at Sanji, sleeping silently a few metres away from him.

_Shitty cook...why do you have to make it so hard for me? Bastard, I swear you enjoy teasing me like a damn school girl..._

__Zoro had, in no uncertain terms, been left holding the baby on this one. With a sleeping Sanji in his arms, and an obvious embarrassment in his attitude which said 'I cannot belief what just happened', the crew had almost felt sorry for him. Almost.

Nami was the first to take the delicious bait waiting for her.

"So..." she began, a false casualness to her tone, "Sanji sure gets horny when he's drunk, I'll bet Zoro?"

Zoro had said nothing. He just watched Sanji...and used him as a shield from the eyes of his nakama.

_Shit._

__"W-what the hell, woman? What are you implying?" Zoro growled, realising he was exprected to take this opportunirty to 'reveal all'.

He heard Nami's laugh ring out- she sounded so damn pleased.

"Me? Oh, nothing! I was just speculating," she added, sheer pleasure lacing her voice, "Right, Robin? I don't think I've seen Sanji-san drunk before. He only drinks wine - he keeps the sake especially for _his marimo..."_

She said the last two words so coyly, that Zoro nearly hit her. Had she been anyone else (except another girl...or Chopper) he _would _have hit her. But Zoro hed back. He heard Robin stifle a chuckle.

"I think you're correct, Navigator-san...he certainly lets his inhibitions go when he's drunk, doesn't he?" she mused happily. "I think he needs to g to bed don't you, Swordsman-san?"

Only Robin and Nami had spoken so far - they were of course, the reason for the situation, and were expecting the outcome. Luffy wasn't interested - he was too busy trying to sqeeze himself into the discarded beer bottles to care that his nakama were about to go at it on Merry's deck ; Usopp had let his jaw drop and was staring...he hadn't moved a muscle (not even blinked...) since Sanji had straddled Zoro, and Chopper, who had at first been incredibly embarrassed, now busied himself with making sure Usopp hadn't gone into shock...

That had left the women to tease Zoro with innuendos as he got up, swung the cook over his shoulder, and carried him away to bed, saying,

"Robin's right. I'll take the shitty cook to bed with m-" he stopped short as he heard the girls snigger behind him, and he didn't bother to hide the red flooding his cheeks.

"Ah, you do that, Zoro. But be gentle with him, won't you?"

"Indeed Zoro-san. Remember, those hammocks aren't very stable- they're no good for erratic motions..."

Zoro just trudged across the deck, annoyed, to the cabin.

After all, he was dog tired.

_And bloody horny too...thanks, shit-cook._

_**A**_**uthor's note: And that's a wrap! I figured I'd end it here, because...well, I just felt like it :D Hope you enjoyed it...it was fun to write, but I'd really appreciate the reviews...*confidence crashes* oh, umm...never mind, there's really no need...I mean, you can if you want to, but...thanks for reading xD**


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